Its been a Sad day for Sarah Hall...

What with the stress of the Hindu dancer yesterday (of which she very nearly mentioned in the press release,) and of course the lack of her year 13 form: 13SRH. Fact of the matter is, today she seemed almost as if she was going to go home a drink herself into an early grave, infact; im quite sure was demanding gin at some point in the afternoon.

No, the first thing I can see when I think of our atheists antics today, was of course when she used her own keys against me - I say me, it was more the class, and actually she just stood there and tryed to do her scariest threatening look whilst holding a key at arms length (Sazz is yet to understand that her face is scary enough already without the half laughing half angry smile she insists is threatening.)

Its a shame that this picture dosn't portray the
rather clashing purple tights she tried to pull off.
Quirky? hmmm. What would Gok say?

This however was not one of her random moments (which usually consists of singing and dancing) no, this one was a follow up to her NDE - Near Death Experience, for those that suffered through those year 10 lessons, oh so many years ago. Sarah was casually strolling across tesco carpark back to her red mini cooper with shopping in hand (I dread to think what..) only to be advanced by a couple of men wearing balaclavas, this however, was not going to shake our Sarah, - not even the crow bar in the hands of one of the masked men effected her. (Yes, we can only assume that she was pissed and didn't know what was going on.) Luckily for her, she has one of the loudest voices Oldham has ever had to listen to, and that was something the men were not expecting. As they advanced her and demanded the keys to her car: She recalls: "I charged at them, I had my keys between my fingers like so (Click on photo at this point) and cut the arm of the crow bar man, he dropped the crow bar and before I had time to pick it up to twat the bastard they'd gone. - The police came after taking there time and asked me if i could remember a description." At this point, Sarah we assume was legless after downing the rest of the vodka she'd just purchased from Tesco. She informed the police "well, they had gloves and balaclava on didn't they you twit." 

The car that the men managed to get away in was tracked down later to Stockport and in the boot of the car was a clone number plate for the very one on the back of Sazz's red mini cooper. Now, I'm sure that this isn't the case, but I'm just putting it out there if this was back in the day when our Sarah was single - Could it have been Dan who tried to steal her car? is that still his plot? is he just using her now to get hold of the car? - its the only logical explanation for their relationship surely! Just putting that out there.

(of course, I do admire Sarah, and erm, sure that her relationship isn't a sham.) (noted: I admire Dan more for putting up with her.) 

Peace out hoes, L.